One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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