Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
