remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
