That's when you crack a 10am beer
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
