I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
