on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
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