dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
