I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize