she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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