hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
