Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
