Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I feel like death gave me a hand job
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
