i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Randomize
