I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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