You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
