real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
