but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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