I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
