eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
