im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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