I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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