oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
