Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize
