she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
tell me about the eggs
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