what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
