hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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