theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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