Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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