It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
