question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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