I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Randomize
