Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
