Grow some girl-balls and come out already
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
