Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize