But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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