Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
