what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
My vagina is very pro this idea
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
