We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
