New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
