Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
