Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
