good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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