I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
