btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I hope mine doesn't look like that
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
