I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize