Plan B is the new Plan A
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
