Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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