i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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