My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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