Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize