i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
