I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
